What I've Been Reading...

So, I've been reading this book lately, my brother gave it to me for Christmas. It's titled "Infidel" by Ayaan Hirshi Ali. Although it's graphic at parts, I've found it to be a good autobiography with details about the political and religious history of African countries that I never knew before. I'm entirely sure how accurate the historical information is, the author even admits that she has had to recount everything without any help from her family. So, take into account that I have not finished the book, but I highly recommend it to anyone even remotely in islam.

Something I Stole from Sam...

1. what did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?
Got my tragus pierced, lived in my first apartment, I don't know...
2. did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't remember if I made any last year, but I think I will this year.
3. did anyone close to you give birth?
No
4. did anyone close to you die?
No
5. what countries did you visit?
The good ole U.S. of A.
6. what would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
More discipline... better character judgment
7. what date from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory?
Many from this fall, but more so Ignite (so Dec. 28-30)
8. what was your biggest achievement of the year?
Probably making it through it... especially finishing my term as an RA
9. what was your biggest failure?
Judging who to trust and who not to trust...
10. did you suffer illness or injury?
well, illness like normal colds, flu, etc and then headaches and all that... but ya know...
11. what was the best thing you bought? .
My pumas :o) and tons and tons of books
12. whose behavior merited celebration?
Wow... a lot of people, a lot. :o) I can't even start... thanks guys :o)
13. whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Well... I'm not gona mention any names...
14. where did most of your money go?
School, rent, food, utilities... other than that, books, music, food :o)
15. what did you get really, really, really excited about?
Ignite!
16. what song will always remind you of 2007?
"Lord Have Mercy on a Country Boy" - Josh Turner
"East to West" - Casting Crowns
"The More Boys I Meet" - Carrie Underwood
17. compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder?
Happier I think... but sometimes I'm not sure
ii. thinner or fatter?
Thinner :oD
iii. richer or poorer?
About the same...
18. what do you wish you'd done more of?
Read more... especially my Bible
19. what do you wish you'd done less of?
Argued, avoided people, etc
20. how will you be spending Christmas?
I woke up, had breakfast with the family, opened presents, and went over to my grandma's for the rest of the day. :o)
22. did you fall in love in 2007?
Yeah... but it didn't really turn out that well... :o/
24. what was your favorite TV program?
NCIS, N3mbers
25. do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I kinda have a hate deficit... :o/
26. what was the best book you read?
The Bible... really, but other than that Safe People, Purpose Driven Life, all the HPs... :o) I duno, a lot of books!
27. what was your greatest musical discovery?
Sho Baraka, Taylor West, Josh Turner (I think that was at the very end of 2006... but I'm still countin it!)
28. what did you want and get?
A deeper relationship with Jesus, to see Stephanie, my macbook :o)
29. what did you want and not get?
What I was promised... hmmm....
30. what was your favorite film of this year?
Amazing Grace
31. what did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I went out for pizza and beer with my family and a few friends, hung out at the mall, went to a halloween party... got angry and cried... got over it... and 21
32. what one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Making decisions based on the wisdom I had with hindsight, having things work out how I wanted... but I know that God knows better than I do...
33. how would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
Hm... whatever I had before? Jeans, shirts, I duno... sweet pumas tho! :o)
34. what kept you sane?
Music, God, driving, music, stephanie, music, God
35. which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don't 'fancy' public figures much... but I did have a crush on Josh Turner... lol
36. what political issue stirred you the most?
Social injustices, but I learned the most about stem cell research
37. who did you miss?
Stephanie, TK, Tory, Lamb, Kim Smith, Jeff, pretty much everyone from LT
38. who was the best new person you met?
Tony, Charlie, Lindsey, Drew, Michelle, Nate, yeah... a lot of people
39. tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007:
Wow, too many to list really... to trust God, that I really don't trust God but that He will help me to trust Him over time... so I should aspire to it... I don't know, there's a lot...
40. quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"There's some things that I regret,
Some words I wish had gone unsaid,
Some starts, that had some bitter endings,
Been some bad times I've been through,
Damage I cannot undo.
Some things, I wish I could do all all over again,
But it don't really matter,
When life gets that much harder,
It makes you that much stronger,
Oh, some pages turned, some bridges burned,
But there were, lessons learned.

And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,
And everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,
Every change, life has thrown me,
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,
I'm grateful, for every scar,
Some pages turned, some bridges burned,
But there were lessons learned.

There's mistakes that I have made,
Some chances I just threw away,
Some roads,I never should have taken,
Been some signs I didn't see,
Hearts that I hurt needlessly,
Some wounds, that I wish I could have one more chance to mend,
But it don't make no difference,
The past can't be rewritten,
You get the life you're given,
Oh, some pages turned, some bridges burned,
But there were, lessons learned." - Carrie Underwood

Ramblings from awhile back...

So I found this from awhile ago, I think I like it...

My God is a god who made me and knows me better than I know myself. He has pursued my heart since the day I was born. He sent His son to die for me, even though His life was blamess and my life has been shameful to say the least. And not because of anything I did, not because of my character, but because of HIS character, He did this. He loves me in such a deep and devoted way, it is unlike anything I've ever known. He constantly draws me closer to Him and is perfecting who I am, so I can bring Him glory and others around me can have a relationship with Him like I do, because it is only then, that our deepest, truest happiness emerges. He gives peace and hope and strength in times of turmoil, dispair and fear. It's hard for me to fathom that my God, who is so great and just, knows all of me, He knows all the crappy things that I have done and will still do, and STILL He has died for me and loves me more than anything. "Who am I to be loved this way?" :D

Hmmm....

I was going to post right now because Megan's been asking me to start posting again, but I really kind of lost what I was going to say. I guess I'm really grateful for my friends right now, even though I haven't/won't see most of them for awhile. I'm really thankful for Stephanie because she's helped me through a lot and always seems to be there for me. I don't know what I've done to be blessed with such a wonderful friend.

I wish I could chase God more. I want everything in me to be racing after God and I keep trying so hard, but I feel like all I do is fail miserably. It makes me sad. I bet it makes Jesus sad too. :o/

On another note, I've realized that I've felt like Anna from the OC in most of my dating life. I had a short sprint of feeling like I was on top there way back when but that notion came crumbling down. But really. She really likes Seth and he likes her too and they seem to be a really good fit, except there's Summer - the girl that always hurts the guy, the girl that gets all the chances that Anna never gets and the girl that always seem to win in the end. :o/ I hope that someday Anna gets married to someone who doesn't have a Summer...

I think that will be the end of my random postings for today... and I'm listening to Chris Tomlin's cd. Yay.

My Not-Quite-43 things...

So... I must keep this short due to the amount of battery left on my computer and the location of the charger (downstairs and I am already in bed... lol) BUT, my friends Samantha and Megan have sites on 43things.com, and Megan had been telling me how cool it was and all that jazz, so having time, I started to create one. I do not have 43 things yet. But I have over 30. Good enough for now I guess. Check it out if you're bored. Let me know what you think of my goals. Yeah.

My not-quite-43 things

And right now, I'm listening to silence, but earlier, it was definitely fall out boy. Mmmmmm fall out boy. I love that stuff.

Unashamed

I have read this before, but Tony and I ran met some people on the street last weekend that gave me a copy of it. I've heard different stories about the origin and the author, I thought it was worth posting, so most history on the origin later.

"I'm part of the fellowship of the unashamed, the die has been cast, I have stepped over the line, the decision has been made - I'm a disciple of Jesus Christ. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away or be still.

My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, my future is secure. I'm finished and done with low living, sight walking, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed vision, worldly talking, cheap giving & dwarfed goals.

My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven, my road is narrow, my way is rough, my companions are few, my guide is reliable, my mission is clear. I won't give up, shut up, let up until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up for the cause of Jesus Christ.

I must go till He comes, give till I drop, preach till everyone knows, work till He stops me & when He comes for His own, He will have no trouble recognizing me because my banner will have been clear."


So, before we randomly met the people Friday, Tony and I went to watch this performance (?) of an actor who had memorized the entire gospel of John. I don't know quite how to describe it, but it was awesome. More people were going to go but ended up not coming, so, HAHA sucks to be you! That was freakin' awesome!! *Ahem* Sorry. I don't have moments like that very often, but I just couldn't hold that one in. I tried to find the website for the guy, but haven't yet, so no link yet. It was awesome though, he's been to Broadway, London, DC, etc oh and St. John's Student Parish @ MSU? Lol. And then I happened to hear from Tony who happened to be invited by Free's (our campus director for epic) neighbor... random... but amazing. :o)


I have much to write but even more to study... :o/

Jagged...

My heart breaks.
Jagged mirrors are better than distorted reflecting.

Gripped with stench,
sick claws at my stomach.
I have only praises,
for reality is more grounding
and only the strong survive.
To be strong, I must admit my weakness
and bear witness to my Maker.
His strength pumps through my veins
like blood for these earthbound creatures.

Better than any medicine,
He heals.
Kinder than any man,
He loves.
Wiser and greater,
He leads.
Incomparable,
He forgives.

Encompassing billions and beyond,
the battle of good and evil stretches to the unknowns of the universe.
War: brutal but the hardest by far,
innocent bystanders all lose their lives.
What kind of lowly am I
to think that this would be about me?
The worst at the least.

Exceeding the point,
I refocus my lenses
onto the cause of the stench.
Throughout the world,
throughout history and time,
the air has wreaked
of the hurt,
the hunger,
the injustice.
But I turn my face away,
the pain is too much.
My goals and dreams are too important,
God himself will intervene and take care,
the poor will all be fed.

I struggle to realize,
HE SENT ME INSTEAD.

My friends, my neighbors, my classmates,
decaying from the inside while still alive,
yet they think that trusting God is a mistake.
HOW have I lived my life that they might believe such a lie?